Price the offer before you argue with it
The number in the subject line is one component of several, and the components are not interchangeable. Base pay is the only part that is contractual, recurring and used as the multiplier for every future increase, so a shortfall there compounds for as long as you stay. A bonus is usually a target rather than an entitlement, and the questions that decide its worth are whether it has ever paid at target, whether it is prorated in your first year, and whether it is discretionary or formula-driven.
Equity is worth what it is worth on the day it vests, which means the vesting schedule, the cliff, the refresh policy for later years and, for a private company, the last valuation and the preference stack all matter more than the headline figure. A sign-on bonus is one-time money, frequently clawed back if you leave inside a year, and it papers over a base gap for exactly twelve months.
So the first move is arithmetic, not advocacy. Work out what the package is worth in year one and in year three under stated assumptions, and identify where the gap genuinely is. Candidates regularly counter on base when the real deficiency is a two-year equity cliff or a bonus that has not paid in full for three cycles, and a counter aimed at the wrong component is easy for the recruiter to satisfy without improving anything.
One counter, fully specified
The most common self-inflicted wound is the serial ask. You get base moved, then come back about the sign-on, then raise the start date, then remember the equity. Each request is individually reasonable and the cumulative effect is that the hiring manager begins to wonder whether any number closes this, which is the moment goodwill converts into caution. Recruiters describe this as a candidate who keeps moving the goalposts, and it is the single behaviour most likely to cool an offer that was warm.
Say everything at once instead. A complete counter names the figure you want, says which components you would accept it in, gives the reason, and states plainly that you will sign if it lands. That last clause is what makes it a negotiation rather than an exploration, and it is also what gives the recruiter something to take to an approver, who will not sign off on an open-ended conversation.
| What you say | What the recruiter hears |
|---|
| "I need more than this." | An unbounded ask with nothing to approve |
| "Could you look at base, and also the sign-on?" | Two conversations, and probably a third later |
| "At 84 on base I would accept today. If base is capped, 78 plus a 15 sign-on gets me to the same place in year one." | One decision, two routes to yes, and a close |
The figures there are illustrative; the shape is the point. You have given a target, an alternative route that costs the company less in recurring pay, and a commitment.
What the recruiter can move without asking anyone
Some components are pre-approved and some require an exception, and that distinction determines what you should ask for. A one-time sign-on bonus, a start date, and a relocation or equipment allowance are usually inside a recruiter's own discretion. Base within the level's band is normally a manager's call and quick. Base above the band, or a level change, is an exception that pulls in compensation partners and takes real political capital. Equity refresh cycles and bonus targets are frequently policy for the whole level and genuinely immovable, and pushing on them signals that you have not understood how the company works.
Asking for the immovable thing first spends your credibility on a certain refusal. Asking for the discretionary thing when the band still has room leaves money behind. This is why the useful question is not "how much can you do" but "where is this offer inside the band for the level, and what would it take to move it".
Justify against the role, not against yourself
A justification built on your outgoings, your current salary or another candidate's rumoured package is weak, because none of those facts describe the value of the job. A justification built on comparable roles in the same market, the scope in the job description, and the specific things you were interviewed on is one the manager can repeat internally without embarrassment. That is the real test: your reason has to survive being relayed by somebody else to a person you have never met. Where you do hold a competing offer, describe it accurately or not at all — an invented one is checkable in more ways than candidates expect, and being caught ends the process rather than the negotiation.
Where offers get withdrawn rather than merely refused
Two behaviours turn a negotiation into a lost offer. The first is re-opening after you have accepted; a verbal acceptance is treated internally as done, the requisition closes, and coming back with a new number reads as bad faith even when your circumstances have genuinely changed. If something is unresolved, resolve it before you say yes. The second is treating a deadline as a reason to abandon the conversation altogether. Most deadlines are administrative and a short, specific extension request — a named date, with a reason — is granted routinely. A deadline that cannot be extended by a few days is itself information about the employer.
Throughout, the tone carries as much weight as the number. Ask warmly, stay explicit that you want the job, and never make the request contingent on your feelings about the company. The recruiter is your advocate in the approval conversation, and the negotiation you are conducting is with a budget, not with them.
Make the counter once, make it complete, and attach a yes to it. A single specific ask with a commitment attached is a decision somebody can approve; three sequential asks are a pattern somebody starts to manage.
© 2026 Preptima. Originally published at preptima.com (opens in a new tab).